My childhood was a lie. I completely missed out. What’s worse is that because I didn’t know, I did the same thing to my kids. I only learned about the lies after they were grown. So please, for the love of Easter egg hunts everywhere, let me save you from making the same mistake and scaring your children.
When I was a kid, my two sisters and I loved Easter egg hunts. Now you might be thinking about a grand neighborhood wide, church hosted event with thousands of eggs for the hunting, prizes for finding special eggs, and treats for all. But that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about three girls in their own backyard hunting eggs hidden by our parents.
Growing up in a small town in the 70s/80s meant things were smaller across the board. So we had no idea that communities had these massive egg hunts. To us, our one acre backyard was full of hiding places and with only three of us hunting eggs (and me being the oldest / fastest / wisest / etc.), there was plenty to be found by each of us (or by me). It was awesome or so I thought.
As we got older, our parents had to get more creative with hiding spots. We all knew there would be one in that bush, one in that planter, one in that hole in the brick, etc. Our parents did the best they could to challenge us, but we were pretty smart and usually found almost all the eggs.
There was always that one. It usually showed up sometime in the summer when we were building epic water slides or planting flowers with mom. “Aha!” someone would exclaim and we would all praise the hider of that egg for choosing such a good spot. Of course the next year, that’s the first place we would look.
This went on for years. Years, people. We hunted those eggs like our life depended on it. And you know what? I was a full grown adult with adult children, as a matter of fact, before I even knew that we were totally missing out on this Easter egg hunt thing. I mean I seriously feel like I was robbed, like a piece of my childhood is now a huge gaping hole of nothingness because of what I learned.
My parents cheated.
What?! Yes. They conned me and my sisters every year for a decade at least. How? Oh I’ll tell you.
They hid EMPTY eggs.
Yep, not a stitch of anything inside. And we searched for those things like they had gold in them. To make matters worse, that’s exactly what I did for my kids. I had NO idea anyone actually put things inside the eggs. And you people put good stuff in them too. Money. Candy. Money AND Candy. All my life I thought you just hid the eggs to find them not to get anything out of them. Lies. My childhood was all lies.
The first time I heard about this eggstra egg hiding fact, I immediately called my mom.
“Mom, you tricked me. You lied to me. You deprived me of an appropriate Easter egg hunt. Did you know kids all over the place right now are hunting eggs with STUFF inside them? Did you know this was normal? And you had us outside digging in the dirt for bragging rights? And then I grew up to bestow this same barbaric treatment on my own kids?!”
She just laughed. Apparently she was not taking this seriously.
“Mom…… what else don’t I know?”
Empty eggs. Empty. I’m still questioning my entire upbringing. You’ll be glad to know I have pledged to end two generations of Easter depravity. When we have an Easter egg hunt for my future grandchildren, the eggs will have things in them. Lots of cool things. I’m already stocking up.
All things egg-related aside, emptiness isn’t all bad. It’s at the core of why we celebrate Easter. Easter isn’t about dying eggs, chocolate eggs, egg hunts, bunnies or baskets. Easter is about an empty tomb. And that’s one thing I’m very thankful is empty.
Now….If you’re hiding empty Easter eggs for your kids, stop it right now. Or at least put something in one egg. 🙂
And if you’re looking for a cool Easter Egg Hunt, our church is hosting one and a HELICOPTER is dropping eggs. We sure didn’t have anything like that in my hometown!